From The Chronicles
SKÁLD OF SCHPLUMLAND
his epic poem is just zombie noises
GREYDWARF
throws rocks. emotionally.
THE BOAR
will path through your heart
TROLL
teleports behind your cabin
"It was a dark and stormy forest. The boars were dripping wet." — Sagas of Schplumland, Vol. IV
Read The Runes
| ᚱᚢᚾᛖ | ᚢᚾᛞᛖᚾᛁᚨᛒᛚᛖ ᛏᚱᚢᛏᚺ |
|---|---|
| Server name | SPIMHEIM |
| World | SCHPLUMLAND |
| Host | A Raspberry Pi 5, straining like it owes the gods a feast |
| Status | LIKELY ONLINE* |
| Vikings online | The Smelt One (you, probably) |
| World modifiers | Resources: MUCH MORE · Player events: DISABLED (anti-fun) |
| Building cost | Full price, inflation and all |
| The password | etched onto the soul of a goat → LICK THE GOAT |
| Reachable at | valheim.lucbucher.ch:2456 |
| Network access | the magic tunnel (Caddy, the sacred port 80) |
Denizens & Local Troublemakers
MAHMOODS WIFE
his horn holds the answers. lick it.
CHUCKLER
knows where you sleep
THE ANCIENT ONE
you are standing on his lawn
REMAINS OF THE LAST GUESTBOOK
stolen by the midget at the gasstation
The Tomb Of Damned Moments
cursed screenshots, deep-fried to taste. add yours: scp cursed.png pi@192.168.0.21:/home/pi/valheim-homepage/pictures/
summoning the cursed images from beyond the great firewall...
(if this never resolves, the messenger ravens were eaten again)
(if this never resolves, the messenger ravens were eaten again)
The Sacred Honk Ritual
The password of Schplumland is known only to mahmood the goat.
To learn it, thou must honk his horn seven times, no more, no less.
Few have tried. None left the same.
HONKS: 0 / 7
Mahmood stops chewing. A low, terrible honk ripples across the fjord.
MAHMOOD DECREES THE SACRED PASSWORD:
SPIMMEL
(the password is Spimmel, because of course it is)
psst: latelyn the goose knows a shortcut. press G to goose.